The Loyalist and the Patriot
by audemady
Summary: Based on the Felicity Series. Emeline is a wealthy loyalist with a bright future ahead of her when she is suddenly taken hostage by the patriot militia. She assimilates into her life as a prisoner and her life continues to change when she befriends the handsome patriot Captain Ben Davidson. Includes flashbacks of Ben and Felicity. Please Review! 3 Benicity 3
1. Taken

Chapter 1

July 1782

Williamsburg, Virginia

Emeline Claiborne was without any question the most beautiful young girl in Williamsburg. She was tall and thin, her vibrant red hair outlined a face with delicate features, and her eyes were the color of the ocean. She had suitors asking her father's permission to court her since the young age of eleven. But she refused every single one of them.

Emeline was also unusually intelligent, she spoke French and Latin fluently, practiced advanced mathematics in her free time, and read as many books on history and art that she could lay her hands on. She was by all means a liberated woman, she had reached "enlightenment" and perhaps this was why she had refused every offer of courtship and marriage she had received. She couldn't be bothered with marriage as it would mean her very little freedom would be taken from her.

She disliked the company of people and would rather go riding her horse or left to contemplate philosophy to herself. She had a free spirit and spent most of her time outdoors.

However, when she was around people, she would often offend them with her fiery temper. Most people agreed that while Emeline Claiborne was beautiful she had an unflattering personality. She was not a mean person, no, Emeline was quite the opposite she had more tolerance and love than most people, she was however not afraid to express her feelings honestly and sometimes brutally. Had she been born at a later time she would not of been thought upon as being unpleasant but in 18th century Virginia, her behavior was deemed inappropriate for a young woman.

The only people that Emeline allowed herself to get close to were her doting parents Henry and Elizabeth Claiborne. Both of who had been born in England. Her father was a close advisor and friend of the governor of Virginia, and his loyalties lied with the King.

Many people were often shocked at the thought that Emeline was in fact a loyalist because her mannerism screamed PATRIOT.

What she lacked in people skills she made up for in her ability to calm horses. Her quite nature made her approachable by even the most difficult and stubborn of horses. She was known throughout Williamsburg for her ability to "cure" horses of their fright of the harness or saddle. She was possibly the most puzzling and intriguing person that lived in Williamsburg.

The Claiborne family sat at their dining room table on a particularly beautiful July evening.

Henry talked about his day at work with the Governor. Elizabeth replayed the events of her ladies sewing circle, and the young Emeline talked about the horse whom she had just begun to work with.

They were the portrait of a perfect Loyalist family. The father, who worked for the Governor himself and who was well acquainted with members of the parliament back in England. Nationalism for his beloved homeland ran strongly through his blood. The mother, who was a doting wife and mother, stayed at home and kept house, sewed everyone's clothes and she had a never endless supply of gossip. Lastly there was their daughter, who loved her parents dearly, she was beautiful, intelligent, and knew exactly how her future home should be kept.

As the dinner conversation shifted towards talk of the ongoing war, the family held firm to their beliefs, every single on of them agreed wholeheartedly that England was their motherland and that it should remain that way.

As dinner ended and night began to fall Emeline kissed her parents foreheads and bade them goodnight.

She slipped out the back door and began her traditional leisurely walk down the Duke of Gloucester Street. She loved Williamsburg most when it's streets were empty, she loved those times in the mornings when everyone was still asleep and those times in the evenings when everyone was returning home and going to sleep.

She walked at a slow and steady pace. Humming to herself. The air outside was slightly breezy but it was still that perfect and wonderful summer night. She kicked up dust and gravel as she walked down the street. The windows of the houses were darkened. She continued to walk as she entered the business part of town.

She could hear the rowdy laughter wafting out of the tavern. She would pause occasionally to peer in the windows of the many shops lining the street.

She stopped abruptly at one of the general stores; she could hear hushed voices coming from inside the store. She pressed her nose up against the class to see what was happening inside. She could make out several dark figures lifting boxes and sacks of sugar and flour and moving them out the back door.

This puzzled Emeline, she knew the shops owner, he was a good friend of her fathers and a loyalist. The owner was currently on a commissioner trip. She continued to peer in the window trying to distinguish who the men were. She decided to slip around the back of the building to see where they were taking the boxes. She crept slowly around the side of the shop. She poked her head around the corner cautiously and she could immediately see that they were loading everything onto a wagon. She could see the men more clearly and she noticed immediately that some of the men were wearing patriot military uniforms.

She drew back and knew she had to tell her father that the men were robbing the store but she tripped over an empty crate and fell down with a large crash. She scrambled to her feet quickly.

A few of the men turned and hollered, "Who's there?"

Emeline was shaking with fear. One of the men ran to where she was hidden behind the wall. She closed her eyes and tried to remain silent but the man turned his head around the corner and immediately saw her.

"What the hell do you think your doing"? He said as he grabbed her arms and began dragging her inside the store.

He pushed her into a chair and tied her arms to the side of the chair and her feet to the legs of the chair. The room began to fill with more men. They were all grumbling.

"Who is that", "Do you think she saw what we were doing?" "Is she a loyalist".

One of them turned to face her and asked, "What's your name"?

She looked at the man and screeched, "I'm not telling you, you filthy thief!"

The soldier was quick to slap her across the face. She felt a sharp stinging pain trickle up the side of her face and she could feel the urge to cry but she thought to herself _I must not cry, I cannot cry, I cannot cry in front of these thief's. _

She heard the room silence when a young man of tall and muscular stature entered the room; he had dark brown hair, and eyes the color of chocolate.

"Frankie! We do not abuse our prisoners!" He yelled at the man who had slapped her.

He stepped forward to Emeline and grabbed her chin to look at her cheek.

"You'll be fine, it doesn't look like it will bruise".

She remained silent. He turned to face the other men.

"Do you know who she is?"

They grumbled "No".

He turned again to face Emeline.

"What's your name?"

She spat at him "I'm not telling you dirty thief my name!".

The captain was taken aback by her response. Emeline noticed a smile creep onto his face.

"Feisty I can tell, never mind, I think I know who you are, your Henry Claiborne's daughter".

Noise erupted around the room.

"CLAIBORNE! You don't mean the Governor's advisor!"

The captain turned to face them "Aye".

"We should take the girl hostage Captain, her family is very wealthy, and they would pay a hefty price to have their daughter back".

Emeline could feel tears forming in her eyes. The Captain nodded.

"Get the horses ready".

The soldiers began filing out of the room. The Captain walked towards Emeline again and took out a knife to cut her ropes. He grabbed her hand and pulled her outside.

He whispered into her ear "I promise that I won't hurt you".

It was an empty promise on The Captains part for he had no idea what was to come in the future; he didn't know that they would hurt each other.

He began to lift her up onto a copper colored thoroughbred but she yelled at him "I know how to mount a horse!" He put her down and she swiftly mounted the horses back. The Captain mounted the horse after her.

"I'm not riding alone?" Emeline asked.

"No, this is my horse, and I'm not going to risk having you run away"The captain replied.

The rest of the soldiers mounted their horses and Emeline could see her life being left behind. They rode through the night and into the dawn. Emeline had to fight to keep her eyes open. As the sun was rising they approached a large white farmhouse that was surrounded by smaller homes which must have been slave housing at some point.

"This is where my troops base themselves at".

Emeline remained silent, but she could see the soldiers dismounting their horses and returning to their homes. The captain led her inside the farmhouse and large, elderly women came bustling out.

"Hello dear my name is Martha, I'll show you to your rooms".

Emeline followed Martha up the stairs and down the hall to a bedroom facing the woods behind the house. The room was simple. There was a four-poster bed, a clothing press, and a writing chair.

"Ben wanted me to tell you that you are free to go wherever you want to on the grounds, we'll eat breakfast in about an hour".

Martha nodded and left Emeline alone. It was too much to take in for Emeline. She wasn't in Williamsburg anymore; she didn't know where she was. Her family was probably already looking for her but she wondered how long it would take them to find her. She wasn't frightened by her captives except for the few of the more rowdy soldiers. She could tell that Martha was a kind women but she still wasn't sure if she could trust the Captain, Ben was his name, he wasn't harsh, he was surprisingly calm, their was something about his eyes that shined with kindness but also with sadness. She willed herself to sleep for a few minutes trying to forget everything that had happened in the night.


	2. Penny

Chapter 2

July 1782

Emeline was awakened a few minutes after she had fallen asleep. Martha bustled into her room and began pulling dresses out of the clothing press.

"I'll wash your dress dear, you can wear one of these".

Emeline eventually settled on a simple ivory colored dress. She washed her face in the bowel on her dresser and looked at herself in the mirror for the first time since she arrived. She had bags under her eyes from not getting any sleep. Her hair was falling out of its complicated bun. Emeline tried to pin the fly away hairs back but she still had pieces falling into her face.

She walked down the stairs and into the dining room. The home looked like it must have been grand in it day, but the war had left the home to neglect. Nothing was overly grandiose. The dining room didn't have any chandeliers or paintings to decorate its walls. There was nothing but the serving board and a long table surrounded by about twenty chairs.

The table was mostly empty except for Ben and a few other soldiers. Emeline took her seat as farthest away from the men as possible.

Ben looked up from reading his paper and said, "Did Martha tell you that you are free to go wherever you please on the grounds?"

"Yes"-replied Emeline.

"You are free to ride the horses," he added.

"Thank you," Emeline looked down at her hands folded in her lap. She didn't understand why he was being so hospitable, he was treating her like a guest, not a prisoner.

"Can I ask what your name is?"

Emeline looked up "No."

They ate the rest of the meal in silence except for the occasional remark from the soldiers about recent battles and whether they knew anyone who had been killed.

Emeline was still tired by the time breakfast was finished so she decided to return to her room to rest.

When she woke up in late morning, she began to feel restless so she set off towards the stables.

She passed through the pantry on her way out the door and stole a few apples. When she entered the stable she noticed that there were about twenty different stalls containing a different horse. She started to look for the copper colored thoroughbred that she had rode the night before. She located the horse at the end of stables.

She found a brush and began to brush the animals copper colored coat. The horse in response nuzzled her. Emeline fed one of the apples to the horse.

A voice from behind her said "Her name's Penny".

Emeline turned around and found herself facing Ben. She nodded.

"She likes you, she usually takes some winning over."

Emeline nodded again. She stared at her shoes avoiding looking at Ben. She wasn't sure why but he made her nervous, she didn't really understand why he was so hospitable and kind towards her when in reality she was his hostage. She didn't feel comfortable on the plantation but she didn't feel exactly like a prisoner. This was what made her uncomfortable; she didn't feel like a hostage.

Ben looked at her. "You wouldn't be so miserable if you talked to people."

She opened her mouth to protest but he was already walking out of the stables.

Emeline continued to brush Penny for a few more minutes when she decided that she wanted to go for a ride to clear her head. She found a bridle and mounted the horse bareback and led Penny out of the stables.

Penny took off into a gallop and for a moment Emeline felt a surge of joy, she forgot about her predicament when she was riding. She felt free. The moment was fleeting for reality sunk in when she realized that she couldn't go too far away from the plantation, she was scared about what would happen to her if she did and she didn't have the inkling to find out.

Emeline returned to the farmhouse with her sprits lifted. She sat through dinner in silence again and none of the soldiers bothered to tempt her into a conversation.

She went to bed feeling like she would be okay. She was still worried that her family would never find out where she was. She was more worried that they wouldn't be able to pay her ransom. She was worried about going home as well, she would be different, she had just gone through a terrible ordeal. At the same time she wondered that when she did go home if some part of her would wonder what would of happened if she had stayed. Her head began to feel fuzzy from her drowsiness and she drifted into a soundless sleep.


	3. Gulliver's Travels

Chapter 3

Emeline had found her comfort in the stables. She would spend the majority of her time with Penny the thoroughbred. She would take the beautiful horse out for a ride every afternoon. She continuously missed lunch because of her rides. No one had asked her questions about where she was going yet so she wasn't concerned.

Martha was constantly fusing over Emeline and she had grown to be quite fond of the older women. She was constantly having Emeline parade around in the dresses that were in the clothing press.

Emeline had learned the Martha had worked as the housekeeper in the home since she was a teenager. She knew the previous owners quite well, and was often mumbling about "what a great loss" the family was.

Martha had been a widow for the last four years and would often recall fond memories of her husband to Emeline.

Martha was also very fond of the Captain Benjamin Davidson (Emeline had just learned his full name), she was often muttering on about what a fine young chap he was, and that it was really a shame about his family.

Emeline couldn't help but be curious about Ben's past but she never indulged herself by asking Martha.

Martha had also shown Emeline that library which increased Emeline's happiness greatly.

She selected titles off the many shelves and would bring the stack of books with her when she went riding.

She was out riding Penny one day when she came across a clearing in the forest. The grass was tall and still green from the spring rains. A bubbling brook ran through the center and a tall oak tree was plastered in the center of the clearing.

Emeline knew the moment that she saw it that this clearing would become her favorite place. She instinctively approached the tree with her books and sat down, leaning against the trunk to start reading. She became lost in the world of "Gulliver's Travels", she became so absorbed in the book that she didn't notice that the sun had begun to set.

Panicked she quickly mounted Penny and sped off towards the farmhouse. She had already missed dinner and Martha was very stern with her.

"My dear! You had the whole house worried about you!Captain Davidson thought that you had run away! Come now we better tell him that your are alright", Martha led Emeline to a door on the first floor.

Martha knocked "Master Ben?".

No answer issued.

"Go on in child, I'm sure it's all right".Martha said as she turned to leave.

Emeline opened the door slowly. Ben whose head had been bowed over a book, looked up with a startle.

"Come in".

Emeline stared at her feet out of habit as she entered the study.

"Where were you?" Ben asked.

"I was out riding". Emeline replied.

"Really you were out riding for so long that you missed lunch and dinner?" Ben questioned.

"Yes", Emeline replied still not daring to look him in the eyes.

Ben continued to stare at her. He felt sorry for her, he could tell that she was used to freedom, that she was used to being left alone.

"I was reading, and I lost track of time".

Emeline eyes finally lifted from the ground and met Ben's eyes. His eyes softened immediately.

"I'm sorry that I thought you had run away".

He didn't break his gaze into Emeline's eyes. An awkward silence ensued and Ben broke the silence by politely asking

"May I ask which book was so exciting that you missed two meals?".

Emeline smiled slightly feeling her body relax knowing that she wasn't in any trouble anymore.

"Gulliver's Travels, sir".

She had the feeling that she had said something wrong because the color was immediately drained from Ben's face. His eyes went dark and he looked down. She watching him puzzled. He seemed to have snapped out of whatever had come over him.

"Well, I should probably let you go finish then?" He said, smiling up at her.

"Yes, thank you". She bowed her head politely to leave.

When Ben's voice called out to her "Miss?"

She turned around "yes?"

"Can I ask you what your name is?"

She looked at him and frowned and spat out "Claiborne".

"I mean your first name"

"My name is Claiborne" She responded, her face showing the signs of irritation as she swiftly exited the study.


	4. Loss

Chapter 4

Emeline stated to loose track of time. She wasn't sure how long she had been at the plantation. Her best guess was that she had been there for a little bit more than three weeks. She began to worry more and more frequently about when her family was coming for her. She had the nagging feeling that weren't coming for her.

She hated being in the house, mostly she hated being around all the people in the house. Even Martha, whom she had began to soften up to was becoming overbearing for Emeline to be around.

She spent most of her days out riding Penny or in the meadow reading. It was now a regular occurrence for her to miss several meals a day and she began to loose weight. Even Martha noticed her unhealthy appearance and would often leave a tray of food in Emeline's bedchamber when she missed dinner.

Martha tried to coax Emeline into eating more, but for some strange reason she wouldn't eat. Martha supposed that it was fueled from homesickness and didn't press much further into the issue. She did bring the girls health up to Ben though.

"Master Davidson, the child is not eating, as I'm sure you've noticed, I think she has fallen into a state of depression".

"Thank you for telling me Martha, Does it not look like she's lost a considerable amount of weight?"

"Aye"

"Well, we'll have to make sure that she stays healthy". Ben replied raising his eyebrow at Martha.

"Of course sir. I'll make sure she starts eating more".

Martha bustled out of the study and up to Emeline's room.

Martha cried out at once "Enough child! You must start coming to dinner! You look frail and sick and its starting to upset me".

"I eat plenty Martha". Emeline replied.

"You do not! Even Master Davidson has noticed! I must insist that you at least start coming to dinner!".

"Fine!" Emeline yelled exasperated. "I'll start coming to dinner again".

Martha left feeling pleased with herself.

The next morning Emeline ignored Martha's wishes that she eat and set off for the stables as soon as she had awakened.

It was a beautiful morning. The sun's rays hit the grass and the world according to Emeline was softened and hazy.

She sat down at her usual spot and began reading. She pulled out a quill and began writing in an empty diary she had found in the clothing press. She recounted everything that had happened the last few months. The more she wrote into the diary, the more dreadful she felt, the weight of missing home finally hit her.

She tried to hold back the oncoming sob but she couldn't but let out a sob. She put down the diary and let her head collapse into her hands.

Ben was walking out by the back of the property, he had awoken that day not quite feeling like himself and needed time to clear his head before he met with his troops.

He approached the meadow with the brook bubbling in the middle. When he saw her, she was underneath the tree and she was sobbing. He wasn't sure if he should approach her or leave hear alone. But he felt drawn to her, he wanted to comfort her.

He approached her gingerly.

"Are you okay?" he asked quietly.

She looked up and was startled by his appearance.

"What are you doing here". She sniffled

"I was out walking and I heard you".

She sighed. "I just want to be left alone".

"Are you sure okay?" He asked again.

She was irritated by his kindness. Ever since she had arrived he had acted like everything was completely normal, that she was just a house guest. She hated him for it, she hated him for taking her from everything. Her sadness had boiled into rage.

She yelled "It's your fault!"

He turned around and looked at her not saying anything.

"Do you have any idea what it feels like to loose everything that you love?"

She knew right away that she had been careless with her words, she had let her temper get the better of her. He didn't say anything but she could tell that he was struggling. He shook his head and began to walk away. She let her face fall back into her hands.

"I do". He said.

She looked up startled.

"What?" she asked carefully.

"I do know what loss feels like." He said before turning around and walking away.

She stared at his back as he walked away. She felt her heart feel heavy. She knew that something awful had happened to his family, but Martha never talked about his past other than the occasional muttering of "Such a shame". She picked up her book again and began to read even though she couldn't quite focus.

He was surprised by how much the Claiborne girl reminded him of her. They had the same independent spirit, the same fiery temper, the same red hair, the same way with horses. He still hurt from loosing her and having Claiborne around made him relive his pain in a way that he hadn't experience in years. Everything about Claiborne reminded him about her. She had even been reading her favorite book "Gulliver's Travels". He sighed at his desk and put his worried thoughts to rest.


	5. Ben's Back Story

Chapter 5

Emeline was still fretting over what had happened earlier that day when she went upstairs to bed. Martha entered the room and began scolding her about missing meals again.

Emeline looked up at Martha curiously. "Martha, what happened o Ben's family?"

Martha looked at Emeline with a look of surprise, she sighed and sat down on the edge of the four poster bed.

"Do you really want to know child?"

"Aye, I do Martha". Emeline replied.

Martha sighed again and began to recount the tail of Ben and his family.

"Ben's family is from Yorktown, they had quite a bit of money from being a merchant, I knew every single one of the Davidsons. His mother was lovely, her name was Katherine, and his father was good man, and his little sister was an absolute honey".

Martha paused her eyes starting to well with tears.

"Ben wasn't even ten years old when his Mother and little sister, Anne, got the fevers. It was horrible child. Anne was the first go, she was to fragile to hold very long with that kind of sickness, and Mrs. Elizabeth died shortly after."

Emeline's face had become contorted, she felt awful for all of the horrible things she had said to him.

"Now Mr. Davidson was terribly depressed after the loss of his wife and daughter. He became distant with young Ben, and as soon as Ben turned fourteen he sent him away to be an apprentice in Williamsburg"

Emeline's heart leapt at Martha's mention of Williamsburg.

"He lived with a family there by the name of Merriman. They owned the general store. Good people they were."

Emeline recognized the name but couldn't seem to place where she had heard it before.

"Now, Ben left his apprenticeship when he was sixteen, and joined the militia. He resigned when he was nineteen and returned to Williamsburg to finish out his contract with the Merriman's. They had a daughter who was fourteen at the time. Well, her and Ben fell in love and were engaged. She was a wonderful child. Beautiful, she looked like you. Except for the eyes of course." Martha said with a smile.

"Well, just a month before the wedding, Felicity's little sister Polly came down with the small pox, she was just a toddler so she died almost immediately but she spread the pox to the rest of the family, it was only a matter of time before she got it. Her mother died next, than her little sister Nan, then her little brother William".

Emeline didn't need Martha to finish to understand what happened but she let her continue.

"Poor Miss Felicity's family was gone, it was just her and her father left. She was strong so she held on for as long as she could. But she died nonetheless. The only one out of the family that survived was her father. Ben of course was distraught, the Merriman's had become his family and they were gone before he had time to register it. His Lissie, was gone too. Oh how he loved her. If those two were not the most lovely and happiest couple I wouldn't know what one looked like."

"Ben decided to rejoin the Militia after that, and that's all".

Martha looked down at Emeline and smiled at her.  
"You best get some rest child".

Emeline nodded and Martha walked out the door.

Emeline tried to sleep but her mind was overrun with thoughts about Ben. She felt so sorry for him. She thought about how Martha had said that Felicity looked like her. The more she thought about it, the more she realized that the reason Ben was so kind was probably because she reminded him of Felicity.

She got out of bed and set off to the stables. She stopped by the kitchens and stole a few apples.

When she got to the stables Ben was leaning up against the wall, his eyes were glazed over. Emeline paused. He looked up at her.

"I'm sorry, I'll go now". She said.

"I'm sorry". He said.

She stopped walking.

"I'm sorry that I'm doing this to you, I hate seeing you in pain". He continued.

She turned around to face him.

"You wouldn't be here if my men hadn't asked for it". He said.

She nodded and walked towards Penny's stall and fed her the apples.

"I wanted to apologize about what I said earlier. It was careless, I didn't know… Martha told me about your family, she told me about Felicity". Emeline's voice trailed off.

"That was her horse you know". Ben said, gesturing towards Penny.

"She's beautiful".

Ben nodded. He stood up and started to walk towards the door.

"Emeline" she said.

Ben turned around to face her. "What?"

"My name is Emeline" she said. She looked down at her feet. She could see Ben's eyes searching for hers as he said in a soft whisper "Emeline".


	6. Flashback: Ben Turns 16

Flashback:

October 1776

Williamsburg, Virginia.  
Ben had been so sure of what he wanted when he turned sixteen he knew he wanted to join the militia and fight for the patriot cause. He knew very well that he could loose his life in the fight, but he was willing to risk it for the chance to live a life free from England's control. He didn't have much of a family to miss. His mother and younger brother had passed away years ago and he felt somewhat estranged from his father. They only people that would miss him were the Merriman's. They were the only people that would fret for his safe return. He supposed the Felicity would probably fret the most because they were very close friends. He imagined that he would miss them. He knew that he would miss talking to Felicity; she had a way of understanding him.

His sixteenth birthday snuck up on him. He had planned weeks in advanced to report for duty the day after he turned sixteen. He awoke on his sixteenth birthday in disbelief that it was finally time. He had promised Felicity that he would go riding with her that day. He met her after breakfast in the stables. They set off. In a way he knew already that he loved her. Not in the physical way of course, she was twelve and he was sixteen. But he knew that deep down he loved her dearly. More than a person could love their sister, but his love for her was still born out of childhood innocence.

They rode their horses out away from the town. She was riding Penny. They stopped in the forest and rest their backs against a tree trunk that had fallen.

He looked over at Felicity; he could tell that she was trying to hide her longing for him to stay. "Lissie, I know you don't want me to leave, but I need you to support me, I can't bear thinking that you're disappointed in me for leaving".

She gazed up at him, "Ben, I couldn't be more proud of you, I'm just so afraid of loosing you, you're my closest friend, and I don't know if I could handle it if you were killed".

He searched her eyes for something more. He sighed.

"Lissie, You are growing up, soon you'll have suitors begging for your father's permission to court you, will you promise me something? "

Her emerald eyes stared at him quizzically. She nodded.

"Don't get married or engaged before I come back".

She looked at him even more confused, "But why Ben?"

He grabbed her hands now.

"Lissie, I love you. I want you to wait for me, I know tis unfair to ask you to wait for me".

She was choking back tears when she buried her face in his chest and began sobbing.

"I love you too", she whispered.

He took her face into his hands and kissed her on the forehead. He didn't kiss her on the lips he would wait until she was older. They stayed like that in the woods for a while holding each other, not saying anything. The years to come would be difficult for both of them.

Ben left he next morning, he didn't say goodbye to Felicity, he didn't want to say goodbye to her. He wrote her a letter and slipped it under her door.

_Dearest Lissie,_

_I am sorry I did not wake you up to say goodbye to you. It was too painful for me to have to say goodbye to your pretty face. I shall think of you every moment that I am away. But I know that deep down I will come back to you, alive. Keep me in your prayers Lissie. I want you to keep my signal whistle for me, it will comfort me knowing that you have some small part of me while I am away. I wish you the most happiness while I am away and I will anxiously await the time when we will be reunited. I love with all my heart and soul. _

_Ben. _


	7. The Harvest Ball

Chapter 6.

September 1782.

Life at the plantation improved for Emeline. She had become considerably close to Ben, who would go out riding with her whenever he had the time away from military training. For Ben it was therapeutic having someone to talk to shared a similar temperament as him, she way shy but also short-tempered and hot headed. They would often talk about the war. Emeline still believed that England should have control over the colonies, but Ben was beginning to help her understand that they wanted freedom because of all of the ridiculous taxes that the colonists had to pay. Emeline was starting to see that maybe an independent country would be better for the people living in the colonies.

Summer and ended and the days were growing shorter while the weather turned colder. The leaves started to change color, and the entire plantation was lit up by the golden splendor of the trees. Autumn was Ben's favorite season. He liked the slightly chilly air, and the apple spiced cider.

Close to the end of September Ben made an important announcement at dinner.

"I have decided that we should host a ball next Saturday. Men! Invite your pretty ladies to dance, and get ready for a delicious feast made by our very own Martha!"

The soldiers seated at the table began to chatter excitedly. Emeline wasn't particularly excited she hadn't loved dancing lessons because she was never any good. But the excuse to be happy was enough to make her anxious for next Saturday.

Later that evening she was in her bedchamber talking to Martha.

"Well Miss Emeline are you excited for the ball?"

"Oh yes, Martha, but what shall I wear? And who will escort me? I know tis silly to think of things like that but it would be improper for me to go alone". Emeline replied.

"I was wondering the same thing, I know that there are many lovely gowns in the clothing press for you to wear, but as for the escort, I suppose I'll ask if Ben will escort you."

Emeline thought amount about the clothes in the clothing press.

"Martha? Where are the clothes from?"

"Child, they were the Merriman's. Most of them are Miss Felicity's, she was obviously the same size as you".

Emeline didn't say anything. She felt guilty that she had been wearing Felicity's clothes the past few months. She could imagine how that would feel for Ben to see her wearing his beloved's clothing. She knew that it had been nearly five years since they had died. But she knew that the pain of loosing someone never really goes away even if you try hard to move forward.

Then next morning at breakfast Ben looked across the table at Emeline and said "Martha asked me if I would escort you to the ball, and I would be happy too." He gave her a quick smile.

"Thank you Ben". Emeline said in response.

The afternoon of the Ball, Emeline spent a considerable amount of time on her appearance. She didn't bother with makeup, she never cared much for the pompous styles that many English girls loved, she never wore face powder or wigs. She instead curled her hair by wrapping it in sheets of cloth and tying the ends. Her hair was probably the feature of hers that was most beautiful, it was long, silky, and the color of autumn. She pinned the curls up on top of her head but some of the strays fell out and framed her face. She had picked one of fancier dresses from the clothing press. She settled on a royal blue gown with a laced stomacher.

Martha came into Emeline's bedchamber to tell her that they were waiting for her. She let out a gasp when she saw Emeline. "Claiborne! You look stunning!"

Emeline smiled at Martha, "Thank you Martha".

"Come now, people are starting to arrive.

Emeline clutched the banister of the staircase as she gracefully descended downstairs. Ben's breath caught him in the chest when he first saw her she was absolutely beautiful. She could see his soulful brown eyes soften. His gaze shifted quickly away as a feeling of awkwardness had settled over the two of them. Ben extended his arm for Emeline to hold onto.

He said politely "You look very lovely tonight".

She responded "Thank you".

Although Emeline attempted to dance she came to the quick realization that she was clumsy and awkward and decided to take a walk around the grounds instead. She didn't know where Ben had gone but assumed that he was off engaging in conversation with fellow officers.

She let her mind wander as she gazed up at the stars, she had been in captivity for four months already, and she could no longer see a light at the end of the tunnel. She wondered if she would ever see her family again. She missed her parents with every fiber of her being, and the thought of them made her soul ache. She was so worried about what the future could hold for her, her identity was shifting. Yes, she was a loyalist by her family name, but she could feel herself becoming more indifferent to both parties. She was also terrified that she was beginning to smile and laugh again. She felt sinful when she let herself laugh when she was with Ben, or when she allowed herself to smile at Martha. But worst of all, she had let Ben know her name. She felt horribly vulnerable at this fact. No one else at the plantation knew that about her and it scared her that Ben did.

She was beginning to feel cold under the night sky and decided to go visit the horses in the stable. As she approached the door she could hear the sound of someone crying. She slowly opened the door and could see Ben's figure hunched over, his back heaving through his soft cries.

She stepped forward gingerly, unsure of whether or not she should approach him.

"Ben…" she said softly.

He looked up startled but relaxed a little bit when he saw that it was she.

He wiped his eyes. "Ah Claiborne, sorry for leaving you in the hall unattended"

She took a seat near him and said, "Tis no problem, I've been out walking by myself".

He did not want her to know why he had been crying so he tried his best to steer the conversation away from the matter.

"You do seem fond of your solitary walks".

"Yes, I used to talk one almost every night in Williamsburg"

He felt a pang of guilt creep up his spine the mention of her home.

Emeline could feel the awkwardness between them and began to rattle on.

"People always thought I was odd because of that, No one ever said anything to my face but I always heard mutterings about how I was strange and that I wasn't pleasant to be around".

"I've never found that about you."

Emeline shook her head "I suppose I do, I've never been very conversational with people, except for my parents of course, and I didn't go to lessons with the other girls, I was homeschooled, by my father, he wanted me to be just as well read as a man".

"It doesn't cease to amaze me that although you are well-read and intelligent you still remain a loyalist"

Emeline was taken a back "Do you mean to suggest that loyalists are uneducated and stupid?"

"No not at all, it's just you are so fond of your own freedom, and do not pretend that you do not believe in equality because I see that passion in you".

"What freedom is there to be fond of when I'm being held in captivity?" Emeline questioned.

Ben shook his head, "Never mind".

They sat in silence for several minutes, when finally Ben broke the silence,

"May I ask you something?"

"You already know my name what more is there to know?" Emeline responded.

"How old are you?"

"Nineteen" Emeline responded

"Forgive me for being bold, but isn't that quite old to be unwed?"

"Some people would say so yes"

"Do you not wish to be married?"

"No I do not, I do not wish what little liberties I have to be taken away from me, and what of you? You're what? Twenty-four and unwed? I find that much more peculiar than me being nineteen and unwed"

Immediately Emeline could sense that she had said the wrong thing. She hated herself for never thinking before she spook. This is why people called her rude behind her back, she realized, she took no one's feelings into consideration when speaking.

"I'm sorry, that was unkind of me to say".

Ben simply nodded.

"Was that why you were crying?"

"In part yes"

"In part?"

Ben did not respond right away, he did not know what would happen if he told her the whole of why he had been crying. But for some strange reason he felt compelled to.

"I feel so ashamed of myself"

"Why?" Emeline said.

"When Felicity died, I thought that I could never love another person again, I thought that there could never be someone to make me feel the way I did when I was with her. But I've been a coward, I feel as though I've betrayed and soiled the memory of her. I can't look at myself in the mirror without thinking about what a terrible person I'm being to her. It was always supposed to be her that I loved, I promised her, and now what?"

Emeline being oblivious to most things sighed and said, "I don't think she would want you to be unhappy, I never knew her but from what Martha's told me she seemed like she was a kind and understanding young girl, I'm sure that she would be glad that you've found someone to make you happy, whomever they may be".

"Are you really so oblivious?"

This line confused Emeline, "Excuse me?"

"Do not pretend that you do not know that it is you that I love"

Emeline's breath caught in her chest . She opened her mouth to protest but before she could say anything, Ben's hand was on her cheek. She finally looked into his eyes. His soulful brown- chocolate eyes met her own confused and swimming blue eyes. It was the kind of look that can tell a person everything they need to know without any words. Emeline knew in that moment, but she was not ready to open up yet. When Ben's lips finally did meet hers, he was gentle and cautious, and against her better judgment she gave into the kiss for a moment. When she caught back to her senses. She pushed him away swiftly and brought her hand up and slapped him. She ran swiftly away, before she had the chance to see Ben sitting dumbfounded his cheeks still red and stinging from her slap.


	8. Flashback: A Thousand Times Goodnight

1777

The last month had been one of the most difficult in Ben's life. He had witnessed Polly, Nan, William, and Mrs. Merriman suffer and die from the pox. His prayers had been answered and Felicity was not ill.

Ben was watching over the Merriman's store one particularly bleak April day. Mr. Merriman walked in with a somber face. He took his hat off as he approached Ben.

"Mr. Merriman, what is it"? Ben inquired trying to read Mr. Merriman's face.

"It is Felicity, Ben".

Ben could feel his stomach drop and the air suck out of his lungs.

"She took ill this morning. The doctor has been over but he says there is nothing we can do. It is too severe. I think it's best if you come home now".

Ben's chest felt as though it was filled with lead. _It cannot be, _he thought to himself. The walk back to the Merriman's home was long and torturous. As they approached the door Ben felt dread fill his body. When they entered the doctor was waiting in the parlor.

"Mr. Merriman, I'm afraid bleeding her will only worsen her condition. She has a very high fever. I do not believe that she has much more time of consciousness left. You both should say goodbye. I am sorry".

"Thank you" Mr. Merriman said solemnly.

Ben walked into her bedchamber tentatively. She looked so small in her bed. She was sleeping but her breathing was ragged and sweat rimmed her hairline. Ben pulled up a chair to her bed.

"I am going to read to you Lissie" Ben said as he brushed her hair back.

Ben began to read from Shakespeare's _Romeo and Juliet_ when Felicity was awoken by his voice.

"Ben". She whispered.

Ben put down the book.

"Lissie, my love".

"Ben, I am so sorry. I am so sorry I can't stay with you".

"Don't say that, Lissie. No goodbyes. Not yet".

"Ben, I want to. I want to say goodbye to you".

Ben collapsed his head into his hands and began sobbing.

"How am I supposed to continue to live without you"?

Felicity smiled weakly.

"Ben, you are the greatest person I have ever known. I love you because of your soulfulness, because of your passion, because of your tenderness. You will grieve. And I want you to miss me. But I will never truly leave you. You must know that. I will always be with you in your heart. I know you will do great things in your life and I wish I could be there for those things, but that fate is not in the stars for me. You must promise me you will live and love fully. Can you promise me that?.

Ben nodded through his tears.

"I want your life to be filled with as much happiness as you have given to me".

"Lissie, I cannot be happy without you".

"Yes you can Ben, and you will".

"Lissie, I love you".

"I know Ben. I love you too. Can you read to me until the end?"

Ben nodded as he opened the book. He held her hand.

"Romeo: Love is a smoke raised with the fume of sighs; Being purged, a fire sparkling in lovers' eyes; Being vexed a sea nourish'd with loving tears: What is it else? A madness most discreet, a choking gall, and preserving sweet".

As he read he remembered his time with Felicity. Her grip on his hand was weakening. He remembered when they were just children and she saved him when he ran away from home. She had always been brave and kind. He remembered how gracious she was with everyone she met. How everyone seemed to fall in love with her immediately. He remembered the innocence that first held their romance together. It was love perhaps at its purest then. When nothing physical was involved they could just be. They could simply love one another through their conversations and horse rides.

"Juliet: I have forgot why I did call thee back.

Romeo: Let me stand here till thou remember it.

Juliet: I shall forget, to have thee still stand

There, Rememb'ring how I love thy company.

Romeo: And I'll still stay to have thee still

Forget, forgetting any other home but this."

Her breathing was becoming even more shallow and weak. Ben remembered his return to Williamsburg from the militia. Felicity had blossomed into a beautiful young woman while he was gone. He had felt so prideful and lucky to have the heart of such a beautiful woman. Their time together was filled with laughter and giddiness. They were intoxicated with each other and no one else seemed to matter. Their betrothal came quickly.

They had talked of the future they would have with each other. They would move back to York and Ben would open up his own store. They would breed many beautiful horses. They would live in her Grandfather's plantation. They would have children. They would raise them to be independent and sharp minded just like their parents. They would live in a country free from the British. And eventually in their old age they would both die in each others arms. But these plans were gone.

"Romeo: For fear of that, I will stay with thee,

And never from this palace of dim night

Depart again. Here, here will I remain

With worms that are thy chamber maids. Oh, here,

Will I set up my everlasting rest,

And shake the yoke of inauspicious stars

From this world-wearied flesh. Eyes, look your last.

Arms, take your last embrace. And, lips, O you

The doors of breath, seal with a righteous kiss

A dateless bargain in engrossing death."

As Ben finished, Felicity's breath had ceased. Ben laid down his book. Kissed her forehead. It was a lingering kiss and his tears fell onto her. He whispered "Goodbye Lissie. My Juliet".

He walked out of the room and out of the house in a haze. Mr. Merriman tried to stop him. But Ben did not hear his voice. As soon as he was outside, He ran. He ran until his chest was on fire and legs were cramping. He collapsed into the grass of a meadow and began to scream. He screamed until his voice was wrecked. But even then, he continue to scream silent screams of utter despair.


	9. Chapter 9: An Identity Shift

Chapter 9:

Emeline mind completely muddled and confused after the ball. She longed to go home even more. She could feel her identity shifting. She did not understand her own feelings for Ben. He told her that he loved her! It was something Emeline was not used to. Many men had admired her for her beauty but never for _her. _The very thought that she could love him too terrified her.

She did her best to distract herself. She started reading _The Complete Works of Shakespeare. _She would take the incredibly thick book with her on her rides. She would sit for hours and read his plays letting the prose wipe over her mind. Her favorite was _Twelfth Night. _She related to Viola because she had lost her family and was learning to adjust to a new environment.

It had been a week since Ben confessed his love for her. She had not spoken or seen him since. He had started eating in his room. He was out of the home for most of the day and would not return until very late at night when everyone was asleep. Emeline wondered if he was purposely trying to avoid her.

Night was beginning to fall when there was a knock at the door. Martha answered it and there was a young girl and her father standing there.

"I am so sorry to bother you, but we were wondering if you could spare any food"?

Emeline had walked down the staircase to see who the visitor was.

"Oh you poor dears. Please come in. I will go get the master of the house".

Martha shuffled the father and daughter in.

"Claiborne, make sure they are comfortable".

Emeline nodded. She went off to get some milk for the family.

When she returned Ben was in the parlor. She stopped at the door afraid to go in. She shook off her nervousness and walked in. She gave the milk to the father and daughter. Ben had stopped speaking as soon as he noticed her. Emeline could feel his eyes on her for a brief moment when he suddenly looked away and cleared his throat.

"Mr. Allen could you tell me what happened"?

"Yes, we were at home enjoying a peaceful evening when two British soldiers came to our home. They demanded that we quarter them for the night. They drank all of our ale and ate all of our food. They trashed our home. They disrespected my eldest daughter, and left us with nothing".

Emeline could feel the heat rising within herself, when she blurted out, "Those heavens, how can have such little respect"?

She shocked herself. How could she insult her own countrymen? The very people her family supported? In that moment she new her life had changed irrevocably since arriving at the plantation. She was no longer a loyalist. She flushed profusely and stared at the ground.

She had surprised Ben as well. He could feel himself break into a grin, but stopped himself.

"You are both welcome to take enough food to support yourselves for a few days. I will have one of men come over to your home tomorrow to help out wherever they can. I am so sorry this happened to you. We are doing our best to keep those scoundrels away from our civilians".

"Thank you sir, you are too kind".

Martha led the father and daughter back into the kitchens to collect food.

There was an air of tension in the room. Emeline stared at her hands and Ben frowned at the floor.

Emeline opened her mouth to speak, "I suppose I am no longer a loyalist".

She had shocked herself once again. She could not believe that she had said that out loud.

Ben looked up at her quizzically. His eyes softened as he spoke. "No I suppose not".

Emeline nodded and looked away shyly.

Martha and the father and daughter came back carrying basketfuls of food. Ben stood to bid them goodbye. They left and Martha went back to her room, leaving Ben and Emeline alone. They did not speak for several minutes when Emeline rose up from her chair and said, "I must be getting to bed".

Ben nodded. Emeline began to leave the room when she stopped and turned "Ben?" she said.

Ben looked up. "Yes?" he said softly.

Emeline shook her head, "Nothing". She walked up the stairs quickly having embarrassed herself.

"Goodnight" Ben whispered after her.


	10. Chapter 10: Mr Merriman Visits

Chapter 10:

Ben had distanced himself greatly from Emeline in the past week. He felt ashamed to be in her presence. He never should have told her how he felt. It was foolish! Of course she would never love him back! He was merely the man that kept her prisoner. She probably hated him. He wished more than anything that she did not hate him. He understood perfectly why she did. He believed that he had deserved her slap. He let himself loose control over his feelings. He had not let himself get close to anyone since Felicity died but Emeline had changed that. She had made him happy again. She made him laugh and look forward to waking up in the morning instead of dreading it. He had ruined his own happiness by not letting himself be content with just friendship.

It was nearing the end of October. The leaves had started to change and it was beginning to grow colder. At breakfast one morning, Martha delivered a letter to Ben. Ben opened it.

_Ben, _

_It has been too long since I last saw you. I will be in York by nightfall. I look forward to seeing you. _

_Edward Merriman _

Ben held the letter in his hands and reread it several times. He walked out of his room and sought out Martha. As her turned the corner in the hallway he bumped into Emeline coming out of her room. He grabbed her shoulders. She gasped. He held her for a moment searching her eyes for some subtext. He released her and muttered "sorry", before continuing on.

He finally found Martha folding linens.

"Martha, we have a guest coming tonight".

"Why! Master Davidson who will be visiting us"?

"Edward Merriman".

Martha's eyes widened her eyes but did not say anything.

"Well, I will make sure the house is well prepared for Mr. Merriman".

"Thank you".

"Master Davidson, what shall I do about the girl"?

"Keep her out of the way, except for dinner".

"Of course".

Martha burst into Emeline's room while she was reading.

"Master Davidson has a visitor this evening and he thinks it is best if you keep to yourself so questions are not asked. You are permitted to attend dinner".

"Who is visiting Martha"?

"Edward Merriman".

"Felicity's father"? Emeline said is disbelief.

"Yes dearie". Martha said as she left the room.

Upon the arrival of Mr. Merriman, Emeline was called down for dinner. She decided against wearing any of the clothes from the clothing press. She thought that it might upset Mr. Merriman. She wore the dress she had been wearing when she was kidnapped for the first time since being taken. It felt strange to be wearing clothes from her old life.

As she entered the dining room, Ben and Mr. Merriman stood up. She could feel Ben's gaze on her.

"Edward, this is Miss Claiborne, she is a guest of the house".

"Pleased to meet your acquaintance Miss Claiborne. Do you have a first name"?

Emeline felt her stomach lurch. What was she supposed to say? She did not want to reveal her name but at the same time she knew it would look suspicious for Ben if she did not.

She opened her mouth to speak when Ben interrupted her, "Miss Claiborne, does not like indulging people with her name. It is a gift that she bestows on only certain people".

Emeline looked over at Ben who was looking at her most intently. She mouthed _Thank You. _

"Ah eccentric! Exactly how a girl should be!" Mr. Merriman exclaimed.

Emeline laughed feeling herself ease up. Ben however looked most uncomfortable.

"How is the store"?

"It is doing fairly well for these times. Williamsburg is not the bustling city it used to be".

Emeline felt her senses awake at the mention of home, "I am from Williamsburg", she blurted out.

She immediately knew she had said something wrong.

"Really? The name Claiborne does sound familiar..." Mr. Merriman said.

Dread crept into Emeline. What would happen if he knew that she was being kept as a hostage?

"You aren't Henry Claiborne's daughter are you"?

She looked to Ben for some kind of confirmation. She finally said "Yes" weakly.

"Is your father not a close advisor to the governor"?

"Yes" she said again weakly.

"What brings you to York"? Mr. Merriman pressured on.

Emeline began panic when Ben said; "Miss Claiborne is a patriot now".

Mr. Merriman nodded and ceased questioning Emeline.

The dinner conversation lagged into more boring conversations. Emeline did not speak again. She bolted up the stairs and into her room as quickly as she could. She could not believe how grateful she felt towards Ben for saving her from awkward and unwanted conversations twice.

"Miss Claiborne looks a lot like Felicity". Mr. Merriman remarked.

"I do not find that she does. Her eyes are different, she does not have freckles, and she is much skinnier".

"Yes, I suppose so. She almost looks unhealthy".

Ben nodded without expanding.

"How are you really doing Ben"?

"I am fine".

"Have you courted anyone"?

"No" Ben said staring at the ground.

"Ben, you need to find happiness. You have grieved for too long. Felicity would not have wanted you to live such a solitary life".

"I feel guilty Edward".

"Guilty of what Ben"?

"Guilty of being happy without her. Of loving another person besides her".

"Ben, Felicity was never the jealous type. She would have wanted you to find a new person that you could love. Ben, you were very young when you were with Felicity. You have changed a great deal since you were nineteen. Your love with Felicity was real but it was innocent. I cannot thank you enough for making her so happy and letting her experience love before she died. But Ben, you cannot live your whole life as though it has already ended".

"But it has ended, Mr. Merriman".

"Ben, there is not merely one person for use to love in this life. I believe that there can be many people that we are meant to love. It is okay to move on. I think you should Ben. It saddens me to see you living like this".

Ben nodded as he continued to stare at the floor.

"Ben, I saw the way you were looking at her at dinner. Do you perhaps love Miss Claiborne"?

Ben looked up at Mr. Merriman startled.

"I cannot love her".

"Why is that"?

"She is not a guest, Mr. Merriman. She is being kept here as a hostage because she saw my men rob a loyalist store. I cannot love her".

Mr. Merriman nodded.

"Why did you say she was patriot now"?

"Because she is, she told me she was no longer loyal to the king".

"Then is she really your prisoner"?

Ben looked up. He had never thought that Emeline no longer considered home, _home. _

"Perhaps its time I let her go".

Mr. Merriman nodded, "Perhaps".

"We are so similar. She is smarter than me of course. She is the most intelligent person I have ever met. She is so passionate as well. I do not think she knows how strong she is but she is. She can be quick-tempered and she comes across as rude when you first meet her. But she is just introverted. She understands me so well. I think I will miss her when she is gone".

Mr. Merriman smiled. Ben was like a son to him. He was glad that perhaps Ben was beginning to smile and laugh again.

"I should get going Ben".

"Right, have a safe journey back to Williamsburg".

"Tell Miss Claiborne that if she wishes to go home. I can take her tomorrow morning".

Ben nodded.


End file.
